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How I lost my sister

My sister is 19 years old. She was in a car with two guys going 100 miles an hour down a 45 limit road. She crashed into a brick wall and all three of them died on impact. This was on July 28th 2009. I never thought something like this could happen to me. I have never lost a loved one ever in my life. I really wish I could make a difference somehow, even if it’s just getting through to one person to be a safer driver. I will never be the same person and I will never stop missing her. I question all the time why my beautiful 19 year old sister was taken from this world so soon. It’s not fair and it’s not right. She left behind a two year old baby girl, my niece. I dread the day she finally understands where her mommy is. I miss my sister so much and it’s very sad a reckless driver took the lives of two other people. I just want my sister back and I want answers – which I feel like I will never get. I would not put how I feel on my worst enemy. I just don’t understand why her.

My opportunity to help others as I was helped at 19

On the 19 January 1995 I was unfortunately involved in a high speed road traffic crash with a power pole.

I was 19 years of age, an inspiring athlete in the Queensland hockey team looking to represent Australia in the 2000 Sydney Olympics.

I was the front passenger of a brand new car along with another passenger behind me and the driver. We were driving to a fast food restaurant for dinner after having seen a movie on that unfortunate night. The driver was speeding and driving inappropriately in wet weather, we approached a 90 degree left turn at high speed. The driver lost control of their vehicle and aqua-planned across the road, hitting the gutter, popping three tyres and ploughed into a power pole!

Emergency crews thought that no one had survived on first arrival. Photos of the car resembled a crushed aluminium can. As a direct result I spent two weeks in a drug induced coma in ICU as well as suffering the next three and a half months in traction and in excruciating pain, bed bound in hospital. I had severe injuries: crushed pelvic girdle; broken arm; frontal brain contusions; pulmonary contusions; collapsed lung and the list goes on! The driver got a broken wrist and a broken ankle and the other passenger suffered a broken clavicle.

As a direct result I missed grade 12 and didn’t acquire my senior certificate. The pressure that was placed on my parents ended up splitting my family in two, my parents separated and that ended the family environment. I felt alone, lost and angry.

Today I make the most in life after nearly being killed. I am walking, running and playing sport! It was because of the emergency services personal that helped me to be where I am today! Their noble actions have inspired me to help others as I was helped on that night. Fourteen years later I am a student Paramedic with the Queensland Ambulance Service helping the community as I was helped when I was in need.

I thank all the Emergency Services personal, Police Service, hospital staff and first aiders that helped me.

Lawrence

So angry

My accident was on a Saturday afternoon in March 2006 at around 5.00pm. I had been working with my father all day on our property and had got into an argument with him about something so small and stupid. I left him there to finish up and left in a cloud of dust as I flew down the dirt road flat out on my motorbike. I only made it 5 kilometres (km) down the road when I cut a corner and slammed head on into a ute at about 80 km per hour. I can remember lying on the road thinking what had just happened, and then I passed out.

I woke up in hospital four days later with my family there. I had a fractured skull and a blood clot in my brain, broken ribs, broken ankle, broke my right arm in two places, a large hole in my right arm where it hit the car and I required 67 stiches in my arm, head and right side. All because I was angry at my father!

The time I spent in the hospital in the weeks following the accident, I thought about how upset my family was, and that what I had done was the reason for this. My stupidity had caused my family pain and heartache. I haven’t been on a motorbike since and also have lost some feeling and movement in my right arm. I accept full responsibility for what happened that day. Apart from the pain to my family and friends, I’m glad I didn’t hurt anyone else.

The driver that I hit turned out to be a good friend of mine from work. He was devastated and thought he had killed me, and is still upset about it to this day.

I guess the point in sharing this is so hopefully other young kids like I was then, will stop and think it’s not only you that is hurt by your actions. That was the hardest thing for me to realize, that one moment of anger or being a hero will affect you and everyone around you for life!

Drifting and handbrakies

I wanted to publish this story because it happened a year ago on Friday night.

At the start of 2008, I was 17 and met a guy named Luke on the train. He was going to work and I was going to TAFE. In June I left TAFE, so I never really saw Luke too much.

Three weeks after he got his license, Luke gave me a call and asked me to come for a drive with him. My mum was in Sydney at the time, and she told me she didn’t think it was a good idea for me to go for a drive with him... But being a teenager, I knew better than my mum.

Luke picked me up at 7pm and we spent the night just driving around doing skids and sliding and all the usual stuff like that. At around midnight we decided to go home because we both had work in the morning. We were 2 minutes away from my house when it started to pour down with rain. Luke turned to me and said “I feel like doing handbrakies”, to which I said “Go for it”.

We were on a straight road and he pulled up the handbrake, but because it was a ute, the handbrake got stuck up. I was texting at the time and I looked up when I felt us sliding. We were sliding straight towards a gutter, and a tree was coming straight towards my door. I couldn't move, breathe or think. I just watched in disbelief. Somehow, Luke spun the car the other way and the tree hit his door.

Luke walked away without a scratch. I ended up with broken ribs, whiplash and a fractured shin bone. But I have memories that will last a life time. It was 300 metres from my house. The police said Luke was lucky to be alive.

So P-platers, please take this from an 18 year old chick who loves cars and drifting and whatnot... Save it for the track. No matter how good of a driver or drifter you think you are, anything can go wrong. You are not only holding your own life in your hands but the lives of others too.

Driving tired

I am a shift worker. I was working in a location which was 3 kilometres (kms) away from home. In April 2009, I asked for a transfer to a location 70 kms away. So far there is no indication of acceptance. I have moved house and now travel 70 kms both ways for a shift. Night shift starts at 7pm and finishes at 7am. It is a wake shift. That means I am driving after being awake for 21 hours. I feel all the effects described by a tired driver. So far nothing has happened, but I feel it WILL happened sooner or later. I have no choice, I am not a young person, and suffer from RLS (Ekbom's syndrome). I do not know what else to do, despite all the recommendations by the Transport Department and Police. Any suggestions?

Forever young - Pete

My partner had been friends with Peter his whole life. These boys had been through everything together, shared everything.

On New Years Eve 2005, my partner and I awoke to a knock at our door. His dad walked in and said “Peter is dead”.

He couldn’t have said it any other way because we wouldn’t have believed him. At the time we didn’t. It was surreal. I wanted him to be joking around, but tears were streaming down his face. My partner just ran outside and collapsed in a mess.

We lived in a small town, and as we drove through the streets everyone was crying. Peter meant a lot to everyone.

He was killed when his car hit a tree on Beachmere Road. Although I personally wasn’t as close to him as so many of our friends were, it broke my heart to see the man I love so broken up and hurt. There was nothing I could do or say to help.

The hardest day of our lives together was at Pete’s funeral. I had to watch him carry his best friend in a casket to his funeral. It was the hardest day. That’s something he should never have had to do at 18 years old.

So please… everyone - I know people say it all the time... but teenagers aren’t invincible. We all think we are, but until someone close to you passes away, you don’t realise how important it is to take care on the roads.

It’s now been almost 4 years since the crash. Every New Years Eve is never the same. It still hurts as much as the day we found out.

Please take care for your family, your friends and those who care about you.

RIP Peter... forever young... we all love ya mate xoxo

How long?

Back in 2007, I was at work at a roadhouse. It was a nice sunny day, and then all of a sudden I saw a truck smash right before my eyes. It was like something you see in the movies. Two trucks thrown into the air, then a huge explosion as they both went up in flames. One of the drivers was burnt to death. As the fuel was running into the petrol station we had to run for our lives. It’s now been two years and I can’t seem to get this out of my head, I’m suffering Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and I don’t know how to move on. Being first on the scene and witnessing this has changed my life. Even though it was two years ago it still seems like it was yesterday. Thanks, Tick

Inside my head

Inside my head I carry around a suitcase.

All of the contents are black and grey.

Images of that horrific day I spent on the side of the road, after being a front seat passenger in a car that was hit at high speed. It’s crazy to think you’re in a state of shock and on the phone calling family and friends, while the person you are madly in love with slowly loses consciousness and later you are told that they are gone. Trapped in a crumpled mess, wondering how did you make it out alive?

Now I have to live with the guilt of not being there at the end.

Me.

Not the other driver.

I lost my life as I knew it and am now alone again. In pain all over my body. In pain to my inner core. In pain forever.

Every day I try to get through but every moment IT is lingering, the suitcase with nothing bright and cheery inside.

Leon won't be coming home

Loyalty and trust in others, to do the right thing, being family or your best mate. For our son these were the rules he went by, always put others first before himself. When someone was down he would try to make it better. If he could help in anyway, he would. Leon was a fine young man, our son, this is our story.

On the evening of 12 February 2005, Leon had arrived back home, he had been invited by his mate to come out for a barbecue at his father's rented property, and stay over – a very small gathering approximately 20 kilometres from town. Before he left we asked him to stay with us as we just ordered pizza. He nearly did stay, only to get another phone call from his mate asking when he was coming out. I only wish he had his phone off that night. He did leave and said he would see us in the morning.

We were up early that Sunday 13th February to plant some trees in our front yard. Our neighbour had invited us down for breakfast. After we returned home around 12pm, there was a storm brewing. I noticed Leon was not back, he should have been home by now. A vehicle was coming down our street, it turned into our driveway. It was Leon's best friend and his father, whom our family had known for many years.

I turned around and I will never forget the look on their faces. I knew something was desperately wrong. The next words he said were, “Leon has passed away”. My worst nightmare, every parents worst fears, "Not My Baby". My feelings right then I cannot write, there was so much going through my head, mainly one of disbelief, this is not happening to us. As I found out only minutes later, Leon was not the only one, his mate that invited him to the barbecue, he was also dead, he was driving my son’s car.

He left the property, took the vehicle approximately 1 kilometre along the straight stretch of road at the front of the property, at a speed that was described as gross excessive. This mate had no reason to be behind the wheel in the early hours that morning, nor no right. He did not have a licence, had been drinking, was not wearing a seat belt and he sent them both hurling at approximately 180 kilometres per hour along the straight road down a steep hill, off the road the vehicle was catapulted close to 100 metres, then 4.5 metres up a huge tree. There was a significant other at the house that heard the vehicle start and leave the farm house and did nothing, then heard a loud whistling then a loud bang not long after. They had left the property at about 3am and weren’t found until 5.45am.

There is no way I can possibly describe the feeling of helplessness that overwhelms us, the thought of our son being helpless to stop the person who decided he was going to put the pedal to the metal at that moment, and didn't give a dam about his passenger nor himself. A quick fix, pure selfishness. Leon was not into speeding in any vehicle and uncharacteristically put himself in the passenger seat of his own vehicle. Why?

Leon was wonderful young man. He turned 21 only two weeks before he was taken from us. He loved his life and he adored his family. It took one person to take that all away and leave our family to carry A Life Sentence. We loved our son so much and we miss him every single day.

To those of you that know that someone in some way may put your son, daughter or best friend’s life in danger by their irresponsible actions on our roads, don't bury your head in the sand and do nothing. Say something to someone who will "listen" and really care; you might save someone's life, yours included. If only Leon told us of his concerns. The hardest thing I have ever had to do was to make a cross, paint it white, put LEON RIP and smash it into the side of the road. Our horror will always collide in our minds, but our love for others has to be stronger. Sorry Leon.

Mum and Dad

Life with obstacles

Heading home for the weekend,

June 20th is the night that changed everything in my world. My partner (at the time) and I, with two friends, thought we would go back to Cairns for the weekend, to spend time together before my partner went on her travels around the world.

It all started in the morning of the 20th, the night after the Origin decider, where I had the unpleasant wake up call at 4.30am to go to work. After those tiresome hours at work, I found myself full of beans because the thought of heading home to Cairns for the weekend was planned. So as I stepped out from work, I was confronted with a car full of eager people, ready for the weekend. Lucky for them, they all had the day off and had the chance to sleep in. So I decided there and then I would drive the first leg from Brisbane, Bribie Island to Rockhampton. Once we arrived at Rockhampton we all had a quick dinner and stretched our legs. It was then the 2nd driver, who took over and started the next leg to Cairns. This was a blessing as I hadn’t recovered throughout my day. Within minutes I was asleep.

From this point on I cannot remember anything, so I will re-cap and tell you what I have been told and read in official police reports.

The driver was on the Bruce Highway for only an hour before he fell asleep at the wheel and changed his passengers’ lives forever.

He was apparently speeding at the time he left the road, and as soon as he hit the shoulder of the corner he woke up and tried his very best to make it go unnoticed. Through his attempt to bring the car back, the swerve caused the car to flip head over 15 times down an embankment.

Apparently during that 15 flip episode I was thrown from the car out the window. I was found a good 50 meters from where the car came to rest. I owe my life to a man who was flagged down as he drove passed at about 1am. He called in and reported the accident.

I shattered many bones in my spine, snapped my right wrist and right shoulder, from breaking the seat belt with my abdomen. I lacerated my spleen and slammed my head in the process; I lost teeth, tore ears and broke my jaw, which put me in a coma for 19 days. I was flown from the site in a rescue helicopter to Brisbane (where there were no beds), then onto Townsville ICU, by the flying doctors service.

Upon waking from my 3 week coma, I still could not remember anything because I was in PTA (post traumatic amnesia) for the next 6 months.

So 6 years later, as a result of that one person falling asleep, I am unable to work, study, or do share trading. I sustained a closed head injury, multiple damage to my back, which of course limits things I can perform, sitting or standing. With regards to my head injury, I have short term memory loss (for life). I keep 3 diaries, and my mobile phone is used daily for reminders (this helps).

Not a day goes by when I don’t think "why me" or "what if"' and I still get the feelings of depression, especially when listening to the news about a death due to a car accident or drink drivers. Nevertheless I am trying my hardest to move on and see a happy future beyond my life of little obstacles. I am writing this because I am alive, and no little car accident can keep me from living my life fully.